I’m Still Here

Hi, friends!! It’s been a loooooong time!

Over the last several months, our family has been through quite a journey. It’s required forced change for our family and it hasn’t been easy.

I’ve always said that I’m an open book. I share details of my struggles because I truly believe that it can help someone going through something similiar. But, unfortunately, I can not disclose the details of what we have gone through and are going through for so many reasons. And I’m sorry for that. I always dislike vague posts, but here I am…with a vague post. It has nothing to do with our marriage or our kiddos. Our family has actually become stronger and closer as we’ve had to navigate a lot of this on our own.

I did, however, want to jump on and share a few things to hopefully explain why I’ve paused this blogger gig of mine. I’ve had several ask so I thought you deserved a little bit of an explanation.

Going through something that took so much out of us, really made it hard for me to write. It was hard to set my struggle aside at that moment and jump on Instagram stories like nothing was going on. I was in a struggle and honestly a faith crisis that had me struggling with God. I’m not ashamed to say God and I have struggled, I actually think that is part of our Christian walk. Events happen in our lives that really test us, but I truly believe that in the end we are stronger for it. God and I continue to work on a couple of things. I’m stubborn so it takes me a while to fully accept situations. But I’m forcing myself to trust that His plan is divine and that nothing happens without His authority.

With everything going on, blogging took a backseat as I just felt that being more private with our lives was needed in this season of life. I also began getting some weird followers since my Instagram was public and even had someone that was pretty obsessed with my hubby. I learned to block people really quick, ha! It kind of made me protective over my family and scared me a little to be honest. It made me really think about how “public” I wanted to be with my kiddos and the details of their lives…. sadly, we live in a world where you can’t trust everyone.

So yeah, It’s just been a struggling season for us. But I’m still here and I’m still posting on the ‘gram here and there. I don’t know what the future of this blog is, but I’m not focusing on deciding that at the moment.

For now, my focus is healing and forcing myself to push forward. I feel like I’m in a season of listening and not saying much if that makes sense. I’m reevaluating my life and the people in it and choosing who I allow in my space. I’m working on being the best me so that I can be the best me for my family and friends.

Great things have happened in the last couple of months, so please don’t feel sorry for me! Life is truly great. It’s just sad that sometimes that one or two negative things going on really takes our focus and get us down. But I’m working on focusing on the positive and letting go of the negative. Truly, I’m working on this so hard.

I know that in the end of this journey, I will be better and stronger. A struggling season never leaves you empty handed because through that struggle, God reveals Himself more to you. And knowing and loving Him should be number one in our lives.

But I do want to encourage YOU. If you’re in a struggling season, don’t let yourself give in. When you feel alone like everyone has taken the side against you, stand confident in knowing that the most important person is on your side and that’s Jesus. Turn your focus away from THEM and focus on HIM. Focus on your family and the people who truly love you and want the best for you. Don’t apologize for removing toxic people and relationships out of your life and choose to set boundaries with people and situations that are slowly destroying you.

God calls us to forgive and love, but that doesn’t mean that we have to continue to place ourself in a toxic situation. Sometimes it just means that you love at a distance.

So whatever is weighing you down. Whatever is taking up space in your mind and heart that is slowly tearing you apart, release it today. Turn it over to God. Close that door. It doesn’t take two people to shut the door. You can make that choice.

God is faithful. God knows the truth and in the end God wins. Our battle is His and He’s already declared us victorious over it. So rest in His truth.

God has really placed Psalm 23 on my heart the last month. He’s especially taken me to v.5 where He says that He prepares a table in the presence of our enemies. God prepares a table for two. It’s you and Him. But that doesn’t mean that the enemy goes away. He roams around seeking out to destroy us. Louie Giglio says in his book, Don’t Give the Enemy a Seat at your Table, “the devil can prowl around my life and around my table, but in Jesus name I have the choice whether I allow the enemy to sit down.” Take back your table prepared for you, friend! Tell the enemy he was not invited and he can not have a seat.

Whatever the enemy is using to get to you, in Jesus name you have the authority to tell him to flee. The struggle may continue…we may continue in the valley but don’t camp out in the valley. Hold on to God and keep walking. Keep trusting and keep believing that God is going to get you through this.

I hope this spoke to someone today. Thank you to everyone who has reached out to see why I haven’t blogged. I’m still here, just in a different way for now.

I hope you all are having the BEST summer! I hope to talk to you soon! I’m still hanging out on Instagram so feel free to check me out there.

Have a great day, friends!


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